So it's 10:55am and I just woke up on the floor in the hallway on the4th floor. There should probably be no moredrinking competetions.
I stayed up for an hour trying to make my room stop spinning and then I realized it was bc my fan was on
My lack of memory is directly related to being friends with you.
I'm not sober enough to be having a conversation about a rap she wrote in Spanish about public safety
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
The fact that its 530pm and I'm saying to myself I should sober up since I'm at a family establishment should say enough
I was pretending that it wasn't happening. Until we had to roll down the windows as she was vomiting apologies into a Target bag.
We got back together. The pastures weren't greener on the other side, the dicks were just smaller
I'm just here to guide your spirit, avoiding herpes is on you though
I think ppl see us as an unstoppable drunken force
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
There's a treasure map on your stomach. Treasure may or may not be the clothes you lost...enjoy
just for future reference, lake water is NOT mix for hard stuff. nor is it an adequate substitute.
It may not have seemed like it to you, but I was very sad that I was cheating on my GF with you. I was crying on the INSIDE.
Who knew that the guy I fucked on your front lawn during welcome week freshman year would turn out to be my husband
Did she seriously come back inside just to piss on the kitchen floor?
So I justmade it back home and was greeted to a squirrel in my dorm... Last time I let my friends rent it out for a party.
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