remind me tomorrow that nothing happen between me and the guy who's shirt i'm wearing
Michelle found a bong in the garbage and sold it to my mom
Dude she has a fucking rock collection. Never will I ever talk to her again.
The trick is to not slur when purchasing the condoms at 3am
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
RIP Summer 2010. God knows it had to be one of us..
She kept saying 'I love you' but i couldn't tell if she was talking to me or to her beer.
When you see a guy in a wheelchair try to be cool and pop a wheelie, and then fall over backward and hit his head, is it funny or sad?
I didn't have toilet paper until 20 minutes ago. But I have champagne. Priorities.
I'm on tinder and every time somebody says something too creepy for me I start quoting scripture at them. My boobs are like missionaries.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He was lasting forever and I couldn't take it so I faked an asthma attack
so at 3am I stumbled into my parents house and crawled into bed with them, I need to start dating.
I have the WORST hangover. Pretty sure my liver fell out while taking a dump. THAT bad.
Fuck me I smell like cheese
I think i got my first booty call. it was like she came to my house. sex. leave.
Congratulations. Welcome to the wonderful world of quick dirty secret sexy time.
thanks... i think. haha
Literally just stood behind a guy in line at Walmart get his card declined when he attempted to purchase condoms. That's rock bottom.
Randomize