I'm upset that MJ died and all but waking up to his face on my HDTV in the middle of the night while half-asleep is pretty much the scariest fucking thing ever.
remember when jerking off was fun and not a neccesity
he just booty called me in advance instead of waiting til 3 am when hes trashed. i think thats really considerate and gentlemanlike.
after the cops left he pulled the weed out of his ass and we smoked it
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
He insisted on sleeping in my bed. Had he taken all of my obvious hints I would have sucked his dick. He only wanted to snuggle. My world has been turned upside down.
Just because we buy weed together doesn't mean were a couple
she was masturbating to a video of herself masturbaing. She's a keeper
Everything was yummy and fruit flavored and five alive and happymeas.
How early is too early to study with margaritas?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Can you bring me the toilet please
Sex in your truck helped me start regaining feeling in my jaw. Thanks!
I can't believe you're forcing me to handle this hangover sober
Not gonna lie: had to look up how to spell fellatio. Not sure I spelled it right even now. Looks like a Shakespearean character. ENTER FELLATIO, SOLILOQUIZING.
I think my pickup truck has been used for the sex... This doesn't sit right with me.
I don't know how I got home but I'm pretty sure the guy in my closet had something to do with it
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