His room was full of guns. It was like having sex with Clint Eastwood.
He was having trouble staying hard then just stopped mid-sex and said "it's overheating" while pointing to his dick.
i was able to set 4 alarms to make sure i woke up in time for class but i couldnt take the open beer out of my pocket before i did cartwheels down the hall...
I would literally rather jam a rusty rail road spike into my cock than be here right now. The whore showed up and now I might smash my iPhone into my face repeatedly until I'm no longer consisting of any sort of life.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
It probably isn't a good idea to go home with last night's hookup's brother. And sister.
Probably is probably an understatement.
Do you think county jail has a Groupon?
I'm a sociology major remember
Well that and comm
Basically you majored in how to get laid
AFTER I licked the bald guys head they told me we weren't playing
Totally forgot I asked the cop for a theoretical fist bump and he still let me drive away
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
There are two guys's cum on my sheets. Be a man and be the third.
I hope you get your threesome on vday. I'll probably get flowers and a candlelit dinner. trade you. I wish this guy was more of a slut and had less of a heart. I would like 2 dicks please fuck your flowers!
He's like a Lana del Rey song that took human form
Of course I'm going to see her again. She had waterproof handcuffs in her shower.
Not all of us can be into hot dads. Some of us have to have commitment issues and be into musicians.
Thinking and hoping ice cream is the answer to my problems
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