Grinding on my ninth grade teacher. Dreams really do come true
shhh. i hid the ranch dip behind the rooster. don't tell anyone that way you can find it in the morning and it won't be all eaten.
wrong number but thanks
Whoever said that a man can only cum up to 8 times a day is a fucking liar...or was never on adderall
i want to major in coloring with an emphasis on crayons.
so finals studying is going well?
You almost set me on fire last night.
You probably deserved it.
Omg. I felt like a crazed animal last night. My lesbian instincts burned a hole in my panties.
And now I have fucked a local celebrity so double free drinks at bars.
I'm going back to his house to watch wreck it Ralp.
Hey, Monsters Inc. got me laid. Disney man, who knew it leads to sex.
Honestly and this might sound scary... But I want to get high and play with weapons
I have never thoroughly inspected the geometry of my nipples until now. How do I fix this?
He? As in you personified your dick?
Random pof guy just messaged me initiating a Pokemon battle. Want to be a bridesmaid?
He serenaded me a cappella to Ed Sheeran. I wasn't going to leave his dick unsucked.
THIS IS AN AMERICAN HORROR STORY I CAN'T FIND MY VIBRATOR ANYWHERE WHICH MEANS I LOST IT WHEN I MOVED WHICH MEANS MY POOR VIBRATOR IS OUT THERE IN THE WORLD ALL ALONE RIGHT NOW WHAT AM I GOING TO DO
In what world does 'I'm awake' at 2:30 in the morning on a wednesday translate to 'let's fuck' in the span of one text? Where has the romance gone?
Randomize
