I was getting a bj with sports center on in the background
Da na na, na na naa
Where are I am going home with Ryan
I don't know who this or Ryan is but it is probably too late to talk you out of it
is it bad that i regret hanging out with a girl tonight because that means i have less time to sit on youtube watching xmen cartoons?
my desire to fuck abstract ideas (bravery, love, popsicls,,) increases by 8bajillion% when I'm high
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
He knows as soon as he hits chameleon eye status drunk, he is guaranteed to piss the bed we NEED to push him there
It's annoying. I only date people who are 6 foot 3, drug dealers, or 2 years older than me.
Sending a dick pic with a 2010 time stamp on it is violation of proper sexting etiquette
I went up by the border of Canada. We took shrooms and went fishing...pretty sure we killed a dragon and ate it for dinner
That awkward moment when your boyfriend tries to have sex with his go pro on #hdporn
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Rule 1: If any of us dies on a trip, the other two have to 'Weekend at Bernies' the shit outta that corpse...
P.s. I wore your shirt today and it has your blood all over it, but I am at a funeral home and they are using embalming fluid to get your blood stains out right now.
I made him leave to get me chicken nuggets so I could have sex with his roommate
nothing like a long car ride to make you think of all the bad things you've done
She handed me scissors and told me that they were the ones with the lowest probability of having been used to trim someone's pubes.
Please tell me that nice older woman you're with at the bar is not your comp&lit professor.
Randomize