At a sweet 16. cant remember what shirt im wearing byt dnt worry im not sleeping w/ the guy who serves the chicken nuggets again
dude i just saw the hottest 13 year old but she was kinda ghetto.
Something in my vomit makes me think I shouldn't have had that slurpee
My Pizza Lunchables won't fit in the fridge because of all your alcohol. One of our addictions has to give.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Bitches at mcdonalds acting like they never seen a girl puke in her own coat pocket before
Did we fight the bathroom girl ? She just wanted to give us lotion and condoms.
I woke up to a gnawing sound in the middle of the night and asked him what it was. He told me it was the family of squirrels that lives in the wall and to go back to sleep.
You asked me if you could throw up in my shoe.
Someone had Captain Morgan and orange juice at the same moment I lost my hangover and I just had to give it a try.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Maybe it's because I walked straight up to that shelf of vodka with a look of determination that said "I mean business".
I usually have to have a cart! If that doesn't say "I mean business" then I don't know what does
Plus he stuck it in when you were sleeping which would have been the tipping point for me but you art school kids are all liberal and shit
I do NOT want to date a man who has no interest in going to a kangaroo farm
the conference was great. we had to hide the acid in a planter in front of the department of agriculture though
Tell me again why we had to Facebook stalk your therapist?
Dipping my sugar cookies in a glass of fireball and creme soda. This is holiday spirit
Randomize