umm..so Dad's wearing a thong, I don't know what to do
put a dollar in it?
I would like to remind you that Mike's hard lemonade only goes good with an extra light cigarette and seminal fluid.
I just caught myself doing the gator chomp to my tv. I need to get laid.
I woke up to a topless girl handing me a blunt. Candidate for greatest wake-up ever?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
We're not too concerned with getting her out of jail. We're on a mission for donuts.
I just feel like Im gonna be remembered as that one RA guy that used to sell weed
i have a queen bed, a cherrywood bed frame, and gold sheets. how are you saying no to me right now?
My mom opened up my bank statement today....my first alcohol intervention class is at 7:30am tomorrow.
I'll have party bus drop you off in the morning.
My ideal friend would be my dog as a drug dealer
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
So wise, so handsome, so good at oral sex.
that's the first time I've heard "shenanigans" and "apocalypse" in the same sentence
Never go with a hippy to a second location. I fucking hate Xanax.
I'm taking pictures of my asshole to send to my boss. This is not what I had in mind the day after thanksgiving.
easy for you to say. you're not the one who has to explain why you woke up with a pineapple and a used condom.
Found your brother. He was passed out in the tub holding a bottle of Shatto milk wearing nothing but his tighty-whities.
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