There is no way to make a throwing up smiley so just picture it....
We need to start having sex underwater more often.
Dude I was fucking my girl on the couch and her dog came up and licked my balls. Does that mean we just had a threesome?
Is it a bad thing I remember to take my birth control when I stumble across guys I've had sex with on facebook?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
There are not one, but two women wearing my boxers on the couch right now. You need to wake the fuck up.
something isn't right. i offered to be his sex slave and he declined..
not to be a dick but do you remember the names of all your friends i made out with after we broke up?
I am now best friends with a lesbian named Zulu. I am pretty hammered already and made a game time decision to stay here another night,for partying purposes
I may or may not have shit out a layer of my liver after that weekend.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He was spooning with the dog when I came home. Now shes afriad to go near him. Should I ask?
She left a blanket, pillow, a glass of water, and two advils in the bathroom for me. It's like she knew. Best room mate ever.
All three of us got laid last night. This is what is commonly referred to as the Trifuckta.
Listen I just pulled white girl hair out of my underwear. This has got to stop. I was wearing pants all night.
If you're going to do that you're going to need a pleather suit.
"Let's do body shots off the freshmen" is officially the worst thing I've ever said.
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