so far i wrote 500 words for a paper on sean paul performing we be burnin..i can officially do anything on adderral
the 24 hour champagne diet aint going so well
I just encountered the most annoying guy on the planet. I wanted to slap his milkshake out of his fat-boy hands while he was talking to me at the same time as slurping his liquid fat.
I love milkshakes.
Not the point.
he designed a suit out of pillows to protect himself when he fell.
engineering majors are such efficient drunks.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I just found my "random bang list for summer of 2012" that I wrote last night.. It's written on a Plan B receipt. If this isn't irony I don't know what is.
The goal for tonight is vagina. In and around. Doesn't matter who. How. Or why.
Thats like me asking what you think of antisocial polish guys with mysterious rashes
You are the voice of reason. And I'm bringing wine. Like seriously this is his last chance. Don't touch me once, shame on you.. Don't touch me twice, shame on me
so hungover. I'm actually considering eating the snow off the roof so I don't have to leave my bed
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Dude Carly, it's like, inconvinent how often you cause me to have an erection
Just realized I'm still chewing the same gum post blow job. This Stride shit really has everlasting flavor. They should totally have an ad campaign based on blow jobs.
Just had to stop myself from doing a bump on the Disney bus. The struggle is real.
Can't be like "hey can you elaborate on this three year old tweet" can I?
So adding to the list of things my boobs can do, sweeping with a broom is apparently a thing.
the D I S R E S P E C T of sending someone nudes, them opening it, and not bothering to respond
Randomize