yo i just woke up i feel so weird, and the absolut is still fill, so is the 30, what the fuck did we drink last night man? And will you please come out of the bathroom.
Bro... we didn't even hang out last night??
So what does a sober person do in Vegas on a Friday night?
idea:have a jello shot stand(opposed to lemonade stand) to raise money for spring break
I'm not sure what happened last night, but I have someone stored in my phone as 'Aftershock'
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He asked me why my bellybutton was so ugly... and wondered why i wasnt in the mood anymore.
All I heard was "I swear it'll be funny" and then we were in jail.
The fact that its 530pm and I'm saying to myself I should sober up since I'm at a family establishment should say enough
I automatically know you're drunk now as soon as you start yelling in spanish
I will be naked everywhere
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I just hate that one day I'll have to tell our children how we met, makes me look like a gold digging whore
at least I have the sex noises of his roommate to entertain me while I wait for him to wake up
facebook is just a cold reminder of all the times other bitches won my hookups
That broad from the bar put her name in my phone as "The girl I'm going to marry in 10 years".
Philosophical question for you: is it better to go into work slightly drunk or slightly coked out?
I mean, I was expecting a little more coke snorting and a little less kids and cake
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