If you're gonna cry pregnant again I'm not coming over.
can you sing with all the voices of the mountain? can you paint with al the colors of the windddd
wasted?
im pocohantasssss
Dude, she DOES look like she'd give good head. No bottom jaw, I checked.
Drunk, high, and in a taco costume. Wish you were here.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
He said if I stayed the night he'd take me to church in the morning.
At what point did we agree that playing bocchi ball on the way to the liquor store was a good idea?
Well, I made it thru a doorway, so I think things are going good.
I'll have you know my trust issues and my daddy issues are two COMPLETELY different topics of conversation.
I'm daydrinking whiskey in a princess hat
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I m a li title tea p or short and sto u. T.... Here is my haaandley
C ANGT CATCH NE IM THE GIBNGER BREAS MAB
You introduced yourself and she said "wow that's a long name" and you went "yeah well you should see my dick."
Day two of not drinking, I think my cat is trying to eat me.
Psychosis secondary to sobriety???
Because you put the dick in ridiculously amazing boyfriend. And you deserve to have nice things happen to your penis. That's why.
I'm laying in my bed in the fetal position with a bag of frozen peas on my head and the bathroom trashcan next to me. Fucking tequila.
PLEASE LET MY BIRD FUCK YOUR BIRD
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