I walked up to her and said hello and wanted to ask her if she had fun last night... she asked me if we had met before.
She really thought E.D. was a sexually position.
got woken up at 7:30 by a drunk girl asking me where she was... apparently she slept on my futon
she was in a cheetah costume
See this is what happens when we don't have sex everyday
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Doing shrooms is fine until you get raped by curtains
Just had a threesome. Girlfriend wasn't a part of it. Broke up with her by sending her a picture of it. Hell is going to be awesome
she walked in on me throwing up in the sink with my pants around my ankles and I said "i'll be with you in a sec"
If I just skip sleeping, does hangover still happen? Gonna try it. Will report back. StTAND BY
You're an independent woman who is defined by her own actions and not by whether or not you have a man. You also have great tits.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Having weed delivered to your door is like having your own personal Santa Claus
Dude, putting on underwear straight out of the dryer is the greatest thing ever. It feels like I wrapped my vagina in a warm blanket.
It was after I slept with him he tells me he's a juggalo
Well it was nice knowing him
I'm shrooming way too hard to deal with your bullshit at this particular point in time
for future reference, singing eye of the tiger outside my door while i am having sex makes me incredibly uncomfortable
apparently not uncomfortable enough for you to stop
She fucked a bartender in a closed Applebee’s and has the nerve to call me easy
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