i feel rough
just turned on the light, there is blood EVERYWHERE.
paul mccartney is starting to look like angela lansbury
There is a mermaid on oprah and she looks nothin like ariel
Apparently the library doesn't care about celebrating the day Jesus became a zombie.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
HE KEEPS WALKING AWAY. IT'S LIKE HE DOESN'T EVEN LIKE FRIES. WTF.
We sat on the porch laughing about hilarious the sunrise was. And that we can do drugs again in the morning, thank god
Just realized I lost my social security card...maybe someone else will do something with my life
He showed me one of his balls and said "this one's free. you'll have to work to see the other.."
theres pictures of him knuckle deep in her, both of them thumbs up and cheesin. someone should take her kid away
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
eta to your mouth 5 minutes
I totally left my shirt at your house. Also I think I high fived your cactus last night
The guy at the bar repeatedly told us he was an off duty cop from out of town, that to normal people would be the time where you stop asking him to smoke a blunt with us
THERE ARE SO MANY ALCOHOLS IN MY BLOOD RIGHT NOW
My fridge is empty and all of my food is in the bathtub. Just.. Why?
So glad I can hide money in my wallet and drunk me is too stupid to find it. Hangover sushi ftw.
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