I'm gonna have a badass scar
I just walked into the kitchen and my dad was having this uber serious convo
With himself
We have nothing in common but the sex rocks, would it be awful to develop a drug habit just to have a topic of conversation?
i woke up naked with 27 half ripped $ bills in my bed from ripping them off the wall of the bar
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Tonight we are playing Scuba-Keg. Getting keg now. I'll explain when i get home.
I don't know, but I don't want you to think its ok to show up at my house at 4 am with a gorilla suit and a bucket of pinnapple and think id be ok with it
This is all my moms fault. She shouldn't have encouraged my weird fascinations as a child
I just spent the last ten minutes making a timeline of my sex life. 2010 and 2011 I am calling "I can't believe Im still clean" years.
She bit a glowstick open. Apparently they burn. We bonded while she washed the chemicals out of her mouth as I did double shots of Jager.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Dude. You stood in a corner laughing your ass off while folding clothes, facing the wall. Yes, they were weed brownies..
Super stoned right now. And I stared at my exit, thought to myself "hey self. That is your exit" and I kept driving right past it.
She's on her period. You don't know what fear is.
My roommate told me he found me naked in the shower puking and when he asked why I was naked I said "you can't wear clothes in a shower"
She's 90% sass and 10% boobs
Adulthood is weird i just cleared a check larger than my gross income from 2011 but i also just did coke during my lunch break
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