dude im shwasted, kabul is not the best place for this
I'm totally counting that party when he kept putting his hands down my pants as a date.
from all the glitter we used it actually looked like a disco stick
i love beer. I convinced myself that I'm going to ace the exam tomorrow. I can't even do that when I actually study.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
There is something about weddings and lines being done off my ass
His dick was poking my bladder. That big...
That is correct. I did in fact somehow pass out in the tanning booth for over an hour. And yes the attendant did have to open it up and shake me awake.
He tried to finger me at Disneyland! He tried to taint the happiest place on earth!
What's sign language for "you may not be the father?" Kinda important right now.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
The homeless guy who goes through my garbage cans just gave me a flyer for an AA group.
There are five fire trucks here and needless to say my booty call left so come back home whenever you like
It's 7am. I'm making pizza & watching the Matrix. I will not be bothered.
To answer your next question, yes, I'm drunk.
Do you ever wake up and realize playing beer pong with your parents wasnt a dream? Your mom really beat you
All time low: no dry towels so I'm using the sex towel to dry off
you poured beer in your mouth so you could be a beer pong cup for her to drink out of/make out with
Did it work?
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