I'm thinking of having one or both of my boobs out. They're small but they're mighty.
sorry i walked in and ruined it, but i had to laugh she looked like a pile of bologna the way you had her pinned up on the wall
Well It's time to grow up anyways, right? Now that you're graduated and have a job you can't drink uncontrollably
No. Now that I'm graduated I can drink uncontrollably at nicer bars
just mention it in a side comment sometime today... like oh by the way i have a daughter but um yeah my day was good
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we put the last xanax in the middle and played hungry hungry hippos to see whod get it
fair is fair
After we finished he asked if I knew if it was a boy or girl. Diet. Starts. Now.
I'm sitting the next couple hours out. Puking in a potted plant really put shit into perspective for me.
I like to think of it as a lesbian feast.
He bought me dinner. He gave me his jacket when I was cold. And then ate me out in the passenger sear of the car.
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A stranger just came up to me and asked why I hadn't texted him, and if he was just a one night stand. I live for these moments.
Just gave my pregnant cat a safe sex talk. That high.
She has this wild look other eyes like she wouldn't be afraid to commit a felony.
He called me in the middle of the night to ask my shoe size. Apparently big feet would make me an unsatisfactory third for the threesome.
I would go disguised as someone he didn't have premature ejaculative sex with but I don't know if I could stay in character.
So what's it like to be pregnant?
It feels like I'm hungover and when I was drunk I was kicked off a mechanical bull and then trampled.
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