my history teacher totally just suggested that we record his lectures and play drinking games with them later so that we pay attention to the material.
He's doing the single life. He recently finished like a 3 year relationship. You can't date him.
But I don't want to date him. I just want to look at him. Naked. And in my bed.
Saw an eatery called Rusty Taco. That sooo could be me.
Why do you think it's a no-pants party?
Invite says "dress to impress". Her fault for leaving it open to interpretation.
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Sorry I didn't take you making out with him all night as a hint you wanted nothing to do with him...
I called her 20 times. Apparently she went home to do MORE shots before bed. Didnt miss me until this morning. WHO FORGETS THEIR HIGHSCHOOL SISTER AT A FRAT?
My liver and I thought we knew what we signed up for. We were wrong.
I ate an entire popcorn ball before bed. I know that because there is popcorn stuck to my poncho. Also. I'm still drunk. Also. I made out with a 19 year old. Also. #barnparties
I'm high and dancing to practical magic. Your needs for my penis can wait.
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Also this guy in my contact as hairy jerry sent me a pic of him shirtless and said I miss you and I have no idea who he is /when or if I met him but that's not normal?!
Do you ever just feel the storm building inside of you that tells you you're ready for a giant indiscriminate fuckfest?
NO ITS THAT IM A SEXUAL DEVIANT AND CANT FILTER MYSELF
I can't be held responsible for another man's penis.
we went to go have morning sex and I said “I was gonna put my mouth on it but you need to shower”#ruinedthemoment
Dude, my back STILL hurts from carrying the team on BP last night.
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