next person that tells me Facebook is a professional tool is getting kicked in the teeth.
its like think what a normal person would think but completely the opposite.
Got laid at the last second. Facebook chat is good for something afterall.
I woke up and my clothes were soaked in the shower and I was wearing a Ghostbusters uniform. I'm shocked she hasn't left me yet.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Something about a hand job in a car doesn't scream girlfriend
And it just wouldn't be a Thursday night without me having to cuss out a foreigner. The streak continues.
you goin out tonight?
who is this.
your orgasm for tonight
We fucked then made friendship bracelets, his mother taught him right!
I think I left my chapstick at your house when I tried using your penis as a catapult and flung it on the floor. Be a dear, and try to see if you can find it.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
She tried to beat him up using a half gallon of Bacardi, instead she got tangled in Kayla's hanging bra and broke a lamp. She can party with us anytime.
My mouth feels like it's at the dentist but my body feels like it's at the strip club.
I told you I missed you and you said you missed me as much as you miss a urinary tract infection. I get it. You're still mad.
Updates: Made out with a teletubby last night in the middle of the street #lifegoals
I spanked her so hard I woke up Grandma
It goes to show, Sane person, daddy doms, little girls, all of us may seem different but deep inside we all grow wisdom teeth
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