whats the weirdest thing you ever masturbated to?
King Triton
We each get one free throw up cleaning, no questions asked.
It was my first time buying condoms at the liquor store... I was nervous and there were quite a few people, so I tried to do it as quickly and quietly as possible. When I got to the Indian cashier, he took one look at them and said loudly, "Ohhh you gonna get it on tonight, ah?!"
you were carrying around a glass of vodka telling everyone it was Russian water
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Just found out my drug dealer is also a porn star. It's a good day.
I convinced a girl to do a shot of salsa someone fell through the whole on the porch and Sara swallowed a beer tab
I can count the number of hours she's been sober this weekend on one hand.
Just sucked my third dick in the past twelve hours. I must want AIDS.
Just took the worst coed shower ever. We both cried. AND I only shaved one leg.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
please bring me a paper towel asap.
I was drinking wine in bed and spilt some on my chest.. And I cautiously guided it into my belly button but now I dont know what to do.
You slow clapped the stripper last night.
What color suit is the proper "i banged the bride" attire?
Know your penis has been the topic of conversation over glasses of wine.
u kept repeating to itself "hot cheetos and nacho cheese sauce.."
She really wants to hug you. With her vagina.
Randomize