butt plug
anus plug
rubbish cock?
yes
you suck at this game today
i'm reaslly not drunk enough to wtch the fat lesbian on my floor brng another fat lesbian dressed up as a bloody nurse into her room at 2am
Just rolled over and found your boyfriend in bed with me. Is mine at your house?
At one point you starting double fisting oreos in your mouth confused about how you got out of the car
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Maybe. This hangover is made of nightmares and that thing from the Alien movies.
Well i think matt shit his pants so ill mark that as a W
Why did you make me get in the car with you and then not give me a ride? I woke up in a bar with a blanket on me.
I just want to have beer shits in my own bathroom. Is that too much to ask for?
Dude if I call tonight please answer and just say "NO, dont do it."
BAT SHIT CRAZY
It's you're fault, even though I never called
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I can feel my teeth in 4 dimensions. I shouldnt be this high at 8 in the morning.
hes that one kid that offered to spoon after staring at me for 5 minutes
I wish I had a Tina from Bob's Burgers in real life. She would be the best wingman.
I POOPED CONFETTI TOO. Ingested unacceptable amount of it oh my god can I die from this?
Imma make him fuck me with my jersey on tonight while I chant Go Jets Go. Gotta love playoff hockey szn.
I just had a legitimate orgy. Wearing glowsticks.
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