seriously iPhone. stop autocorrecting all my fucks into ducks. you're making all my strong worded texts look harmless and adorable.
She seriously needs to find another hobby other than bouncing on cock.
I wish I could save this moment forever and have sex with it regularly. Its just tht beautiful.
Im sending over a girl who thinks youre in the next twilight movie
your the best winggirl ever
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
tequila makes me forget i have legs
Chicken wings don't come back up an through your nose as easily as you'd think
I bought everclear. Bring your party pants and some addies
You're not gonna punch me in the face again are you?
well don't blame me. sometimes vibrators go missing and people get angry. these things happen
lets do drugs on my lunch break tomorrow
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Had to drive my booty call home because he had an asthma attack after we had sex .. How was your night?
If you're with any of them tell them i apologize for (insert whatever i did here)
Nope. Im a prince of the americas. I treat my women like future queens. Also, im drunk watching the royal wedding
Hey mike is locked out, sleeping on the common room couch, no idea where his pants are nor does he know where he is. When you get this let him in? And let me know ur alive too!
never have sex with a mint flavored condom on. my vagina is on fire.
If you really hate him do what I do: give him an amazing night of unforgettable sex then dump him. You’ll ruin sex for him because new girls won’t compare
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