I hate all girls vehemently.
Your dad touched me again.
If I've learned one thing today? Blow jobs get you to state championships.
Alright. Who did it? Who's bangin' the ump?
im trying to make cookies in the george foreman
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Ok I'm good with that cause I'm gonna disappear for 90 days
Are you goin to rehab again?
Every girl my sister has brought home from college I've had sex with, check and mate motherfucker
Just once I'd like to do blow in a nice bathroom.
RE-DICK-YOU-LUSSSSS
That's me emphasizing the ridiculous
walked into my roommates bathroom to her throwing up a quesadilla while singing come on skinny taco
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I always make inappropriate sexual decisions during the holidays
You've opened Pandora's butthole my friend. There's no going back.
you called me drunk last night to talk about summoning sex demons with magic WTF
you made out with another girl for some wings
I'm like, not good at living.
All I’ve had today is sex and water. I think it’s time for tacos.
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