We should takd a huggy cab to snuggle bunnyville
He jizzed my face. I had to ask for a washcloth. He ran his underwear under the water and handed them to me. Not so romantic.
I'm sending you this that that when you wake up and see the girl sleeping next to you, you know who to thank
literally every day that goes by where he doesn't talk to me makes me more determined to get him to have sex with me
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
My main thought on the Olympics: I need LESS cowbell.
U just looked at me and said "wake me up when I'm done eating"
I just want you to sit on my face and to tell you you're pretty. Most girls would leap at this opportunity.
I just took a shit with a lightsaber in my hand. Dreams fulfilled.
If youre wondering about the smell, i set your hamster on fire. But don't worry he's ok
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
My going away gift was all of them dancing around with solo cups on their dick and balls...these are my friends
my cat just photo bombed my nudie.. does this qualify me as a cat lady?
Pretty sure my parents just hear me get off from the living room but I feel like they should be proud that I did it without a man honestly.
She's still here. My penis can feel it.
Dude, I think she left with some dude like an hour ago
FOUND HER. I swear this thing is like a metal-detector
I woke up and there was a huge blow up palm tree in my bed...
He loves blowjobs.. were meant for each other.
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