We are like the golden girls with less cheesecake and more drugs.
Did your dad mention the fact that you asked him for viagra at 2 in the morning?
you passed out on the bathroom floor with the door locked. we had to break in and no one was sober enough to move you so they just threw a towel on you and stepped over you
I literally had to tap out of the blow job. It was like a pornographic wrestling match
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
i have now been nicknamed the screamer on the first, third, fourth, & six floor by all the ra's. only two more floors to go before i cover the entire dorm.
I feel bad for the next person that's gonna live in my room. There's so much semen on the carpet
I'm drinking screwdrivers in the pool naked. Call 911 if I don't check in regularly
This vodka tastes like I'm not going to class tomorrow.
Well at least you learned that cops don't like when you call them frenchy. Nice dive over the fence by the way.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Guess who just rode home in a cop car?! Your Fav flamingo
literally just blacked in. Im watching what to expect when your expecting, eating pretzels and peanut butter, and I have someone's underwear around my neck.
so as he was cumming he sort of growled with one eye squinted... for a moment there I thought I was fucking Popeye
I had to ask him for a dick pic. Do you know how refreshing that was?
We were having a serious discussion about Blue's Clues and I just kept thinking, 'you've seen me naked'.
Apparently I have a "problem" because I enjoy doing bong rips in the shower
Randomize