I can only date guys with blackberrys
I just decided its a new prereq to talk to me
i just bought a vibrator and the cashier says "have fun with that." i didnt realise what he said so i responded "you too." and then he gave me his number...
It's Friday. Sex?
Life Lesson Number 76: Masturbating into a sock is useless if there is a hole in it.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
You gave him head? He fingered you? A little bit of make out?
WHAT THE FUCK ITS LIKE YOU WERE THERE
Dude, you posted a cap of a porn to survey if it looked like me. That's pretty certifiably creepy.
I just hemmed my dress for halloween, never felt more like a man
I'm the only kid serving jury duty. And I'm the only one who may walk out of here in handcuffs for a warrant. I'm enabling these people to doubt America's youth once again.
he puked in my glove box, looked up at me and said "There's not much to say"
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
The great thing about skinny blondes is that they're all interchangeable.
There are only families here. I'm at the bar alone double fisting drinks. You cannot get any more approachable than I am now.
Only sluts go out in this weather carpe diem boys
Ohmygod. I don't know if I can explain how great it'll be. I hope you don't mind Subaru sex
multiple people will be seeing my nips tonight. not mad about it at all
...is this motivational speaking, or sexting? It's getting hard to tell.
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