I hate bills.
Like ones you have to pay or people named William?
Dipping chips in queso and thinking of your beautiful face
You know you're true friends when you can talk about what sexual diseases you may or may not have.
"Party in the USA" was played at church youth group last night. It was like everything I enjoy hating was aligning against me.
i walked toward the cop car thinking it was the liquor store lights nd by that time it was too late to escape the trap
remember, YOU ARE A WINNER
my dinner was a box of cheezits simultaneously mixed in with cocoa puffs and fried rice.
coming from the girl bound and determined to pee in the snow
why would you restrict a girl of that
despite the cops showing up at 8am, pre gaming groundhog day was my idea yet. and by pre gaming, i of course mean getting black out drunk by 7:30am
I can't stream porn because Xbox live is taking all the Internet. I thought having a male roommate would make life easier.
It hits you later. Like when you wake up on the floor under a puzzle later.
I know of an excellent nanny. A lot like Mary Poppins but way cooler. And likes pot.
Do you rver get that feeling like their are poprocks filling ur boday?
You walked in wearing nothing but a beekeeper mask
Last night she walked off and disappeared from everyone got home at 330 and said she went to the casino with her cab driver.
Remember when I convinced you to watch me eat my sandwich just so you could reuse my plate and save us money on our water bill? I'm so ecofriendly when I'm high
Randomize