yo im tryna cop a beej tonight
I plan on putting pajamas back on after I shower. Today is going to be awesome.
"tonights gonna be a goodnight" was blasting at the club while i was screaming "NO ITS NOT" and crying. How do you think it went?
It's always a relief to be able to look at some one, and remind yourself that there IS some one who gets laid less then yourself.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
yes, the chronicles of narnia is exactly what happens when you do crack inside of a wardrobe.
Just found out I have to work new year's eve. It's like one final 'fuck you' from 2009.
i don't want you to think of me as your TA
Dude they are all farmers and I'm pretty sure there's a prostitute here.
Bring my gorilla suit and my bong.
Oh its going to be that type of weekend?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
My younger brother just got high fives from all my guy cousins for fucking my best friend. I hate family gatherings.
So me and him are making out, and the other two are on the couch behind us. he randomly stops kissing me and goes "oh god I think she just took off her shirt" I look behind me and I see her tits flapping up and down. This man has amazing senses..
It was a great party. People were literally still doing shots and playing drunk Jenga at 6am...
Yeah ok. We can maid of honor each other since you don't like my boobs enough to lesbian marry me
I dropped my pants and she just stared until she asked how is that even possible? Best night ever lmao
I just got free tacos, you would be so proud of me.
Clarification, I got free tacos without performing any sexual favors.
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