I hope to God it wasnt poon. That odor was unnatural, it was satanic pussy.
sometimes I think that if I just met him. he would have a crazy realization and fall madly in love with me. what do you say? I'm not just another fan.
I wouldnt consider it a good Wednesday if there wasn't any projectile vomit involved
I feel like I've wasted too many painkillers on hangovers
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
He came home all fucked up crying slammed his bedroom door and all we could hear for about three hours was THIS ISN'T GONA RUIN MYLIFe what happend
I told him I got this chick pregnant and he has to get a new wingman
I think it's starting to become crucial that I find a companion for my vagina.
"willing to pay anyone fun whos willing to hang out and laugh at my jokes while my friends are MIA" is this to desperate?
Bro if you were a bird I would puke in your mouth right now
I just remembered that we had an in-depth conversation about how it was too stressful to wear pants.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Two words: blizzard sex
No I kepy moaning and just called out a name to make them believe I was actually having sex instead of masturbating.
Good, I don't think Coke dipped ring pops hold up in the mail anyway.
he kissed both of us goodnight when we dropped him off...I didn't know if I was more offended or impressed
You’re welcome stay at my house. But, you gotta piss in the toilet
Riddle me this: why did I wake up next to a stuffed sword fish?
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