He's totally hot and awesome. And he's a Democrat
Good, so he won't mind when you kill the baby.
let me know it goes. try not to get bit. and if you can, get someone to videotape it.
Sorry about last night..I didnt realize how drunk you were and when I closed the door it caused you to slam into the mirror...you'll probably piece together the puzzle when you read this and see your hand.
17 year olds will be the death of me.
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is it pathetic that I think he's cheating and it doesn't bother me because for the first time I'm the girlfriend and not the other girl?
You yelled "sharpie war!" then jammed it in her ear
I think I just need to get a pillow shaped like a toilet seat.
I'm gonna have sex with my clothes on and I'll know everyone there so I'll be in my comfort zone
Bro if you don't text me back I'm gonna send you a picture of my nut sack every ten seconds for the rest of the night. I'm home alone with nothing to do. Don't push me.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
We were high as balls fucking in the back seat when we saw the blue lights. He's like, "I got this" and walked over butt ass naked and goes, "Sorry dude, we're just banging" and the cop apologized for disturbing us and drove off.
Going to the bathroom drunk while wearing overalls is such a struggle
Nothing says "we're never gonna bone" like "nice haircut, it makes you look like my cousin"
Cause I know you wanna ride the D like a Vespa in ROMAN HOLIDAY
AND ONCE AGAIN, MY VAGINA HAS STRUCK AGAIN. HER PLANS TO TAKE OVER MARYLAND ARE WELL ON THEIR WAY AS SHE CONTINUES TO ENGULF EVERY QUEER IN A 10 MILE RADIUS
I didn’t want to see that boob. I told her not to show me but she said “no, I’m going to show you”
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