someone shit in a solo cup and left it at the base of the stairs. fuck orlando dude.
The cereal milk was almost black, the bacon was still frozen and the toast was soggy. And that was BEFORE I puked in her lap.
how is telling me how long you drunkenly fucked someone supposed to make me miss you?
In conversation she brought up that she slept with Tucker Max on the UF football field
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Thanks for letting me use your ID, there's $120 along with your ID in the mail to cover the Urinating in public fine I got last night....sorry
Came back with a random sweatshirt, an American flag, and a for sale sign. Mission success?
Dude if i sent you a picture of the inside of my fridge would you be able to break down and explain everything that was in it?
Yeah I don't remember how I got home last night
Judging from my pants, I embarrassed myself smh
Hahahaha yep. You were picking up the credit card machine and singing to it in Spanish.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Pretty sure when I woke up the next morning we were still fucking. It just didn't stop.
Please note that in response to your post about your dog's jaws clamped hard around a stick, I did not comment, "Takes after his dad." You're welcome.
Nothing says you made great Saturday night choices like someone's dick that you don't remember, poking you in the ass Sunday morning.
Her 4ft mother helped 5ft10 passed out me from the car to my girlfriend's bed at 1am...with whopper in hand
Despite evidence suggesting otherwise, it turns out max is 100%straight.
Think he has a gf
Yea that shit doesn’t necessarily stop me
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