If it makes you feel better he went down on me when i had a yeast infection.
All I have in my fridge is chocolate cake, pizza, spicy mayo sauce, beer, and weed. I love college
dude.. you lit a cigarette on the bus and told the driver it was okay because you were fire marshall of your boy scout troop
I woke up to 30 angry texts and her Chihuahua in my room. Can you drop him off for me?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Before you say anything, my vagine does NOT discriminate against young dads
He told me I was a pleasure to arrest. That's the 2nd time I've heard that.
He insists on falling asleep with his penis between my buttcheeks. He says its his "home".
Finishing last nights 1.5L of wine and beef jerky for breakfast. Work looms, ever the prickly bitch.
Oh, also as a concerning side note, my bra had drops of blood on it. So I don't know what the deal was, but someone I was around was definitely bleeding a decent amount.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
She has an alarming number of pictures with cat ears but the sex is amazing.
Chick in the kitchen making breakfast.. Yours or mine?
wheres my face? and why is my pocket so big?
Let's not forget that we had sex on the ground in public tonight.
And, by “make you dinner” I mean “have lots of sex and multiple orgasms.” So you should probably eat something and before you come over
And hydrate too
Yeah. Broke it off. Saw her cheating after she forgot to turn her zoom off. Ring=$$$. Not making that mistake-priceless
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