At barnes & noble, drinking beer out of thermoses, lookin legit.
I just caught Brandon licking the fake chocolate on a smores ornament
He told me he had an exgf. and didnt follow up with"and now i like guys."
Having him eat chocolate out of you is not as romantic as it sounds. I'm still finding pieces.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
You told me you were allowed to keep eating butter because it had just passed midnight and you were on the next day's daily fat servings
Dude my triple a card is good for bail. This is like a real live get out of jail free card
Dude, Taco Bell gave me a free fiesta potatoes when I won a bet on wether I could fit the entire rim of a cup in my mouth.
You fuck like a mechanic. That is the universe telling you that is your true calling. Take this as a sign.
He raised his arm and dropped it in his sleep to smack himself awake. He knows his phone has an alarm clock right?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I always ask when they're due. It's the nicest way for me to let her know the rest of the world can tell she's putting on weight too
I just sent him 3 long ass texts about how to tell a girl how he feels. I should get a fucking friend zone medal.
I will make you one.
Good. It needs "forever alone" engraved on it
She stumbled into class and Google image searched nipple piercings for the entire 75 minutes
Oh dear. If we're both hearing alien sounds then perhaps they're real.
Getting blackout drunk infront of my family was never on my bucket list, but now that I've done it I'm cool with it.
The dog peed on the neighbors baby Jesus. No wonder she thinks we're the devil.
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