Laziness has reached now heights if you too unmotivated to buy pot
so... my grandma just told me i should be a stripper
well at least shes not calling you fat anymore
As far as classy things to do in front of your ex go, throwing up on your own shirt is not one of them.
I'm half bulimic - I binge but forget to purge
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I felt like I was in a real life creepy Myspace message. "girl u cute" ... "girl u got a really nice smile"
My passouts and memory loss are great training for when I have alzheimers. You'll know where to look when I get lost.
Just pissed by glowstick light. Bad idea.
I'm not trying to be dramatic but if someone makes you choose between getting a Brazilian or dying. For the sake of your sanity just fucking die
I wouldn't be too worried. He's been known to chase a chubby before.
THAT IS NOT HOW YOU TALK TO YOUR SISTER
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
First time for everything: started posting a Facebook comment, decided I'm not quite sober enough. Progress.
Kid got so high from the brownies he forgot his own name. Welcome to college.
And then she said "welcome homeeeee!!!" As she got off. Best thing about being back from Afghanistan
Next time you have him paint you an outfit so you can do you walk the street naked TAKE A SHOWER BEFORE YOU GET IN THE BED. MY sheets look like like an acid trip
The guy whose house were at is drunkenly reading green eggs and ham to us in German
We somehow ended up in Oklahoma. Nick's been crapping for two hours and I'm afraid to call a doctor because who the hell knows what sort of stuff goes down in the middle of nowhere. So not a great long weekend really.
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