You were asking people if they could pee on you while you shotgunned beers
Are we still dressing up as garden gnomes for halloween?
No. I would like to get laid again before I graduate.
Caught my drug dealer jacking off. I think this is a new step in our relationship
I have never made a good decision in that bathroom...
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
my nipple ring is gone but someone was nice enough to replace it with a paperclip
What do you mean how did you end up there? You told him he had a face you'd like to ride, that's a deal sealer in any language.
Can you please reassure him im not a scary or intimidating person? And that really my entire life is a series of completely ridiculous events that have led me here?
Dude walks in wearing jean shorts and a graphic tshirt and goes home with an attractive female. EXPLAIN YOURSELF UNIVERSE.
Would it be weird to tell him that on his b'day he's dressing up and we're having weird Jesus sex?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Drive by water balloon fight on $500,000 boats ended when someone threw a dildo
Congratulations on your downgrade, shes one hell of a 5
Just realized Ive never seen my f buddy in the daylight. What if he looks different?
OMG -- There are strippers in the bathroom crying because their power moves aren't good enough to win the competition
Fun FACT Saturday: Semen is great for my acid reflux
Just threw up in a cup driving down the road because there was cop behind me and I didn't want to pull over. Not sure if winning or failing at life.
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