erin looks like she hung out with the sham wow guy last night. she's got the beat up hooker look goin' on
I almost hooked up with this girl last night. she had a tattoo of a cardinal next to her cooter. said it reminded her of her grandpa
i got kicked out of Barns and Nobles cuz i put all the bibles in the fiction section
The guatemalans kept making all these sexual suggestions ... With the corn
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
making out was so insane. it felt like our tongues were paintbrushes made of waves and we were painting an ocean galazy
No just sleep deprived. James woke me up at 7 and forced me to eat a hot pocket with him cause he " didn't want me to die".
The thing i'm gunna miss the most about college is peeing while brushing my teeth in the shower without being judged. You just can't do that anywhere else
I know, I know. But we've discussed my friends and appropriate social behaviour, and I'm pretty sure topless karaoke was a no-no.
Must've forgot to hang up with her when I was telling Josh I plan to pop champagne if I nail her tonight. She showed up with a bottle and said "only if we can toast it with Josh"
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Also I'm so used to having sex with river guides that when he pulled out a condom I was actually surprised
I just love that a strip club has taco Tuesday.
I think I may be going on too many job interviews. I've started to bring up Shonda Rhimes in my interview answers.
I AM DRUNK AND AGGRESSIVE ABOUT CURLING!
The US is in the finals, aren't they.
I'm sorry I crashed your motorcycle and watched you get robbed from a rooftop. Will you please come back or at least drop off my shoes?
And pointless. I'm fully vested in all my calories coming from booze today. The salad just fucks that shit up
Randomize