she has a tiny mouth but huuuge vocal chords
My e-date is really photogenic. Real-life not so much
I like your house better though. Cause it has febreeze and lube.
I don't think you have any idea how kinky that sounds.
I truly believe that the solid foundation of any healthy relationship is a drunken one night stand so I can just get all the nasty shit out on the table
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I didn't even realize you were getting that drunk until bam!
is bam when I fell down the stairs or when I threw up standing at the bar?
What happened to him?
He was walking right behind us then disappeared.. turns out he checked his luggage at a night club, continued to drink and dance, then slept on the 4th floor of some museum
i think we should start charging the bum that sleeps on our porch rent..
I'd bet your vomit would be flammable at this point. Can I try to light it?
We wouldn't be friends if you didn't.
You looked at my sister and yelled at her saying in a couple of years she will be yours
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
She got tired so now we're making anyone who has a stupid idea go into her bedroom so she can sleepslur "good idea" or "baaaad idea." We're calling her the queen of the misguided.
He reached a whole new level of creepy. We were getting a coffee and he noticed the girl at Starbucks name tag looked her up on fb and friend requested her right there without ever introducing himself
Maybe if I get to know him I'll stop wanting to fuck his wife so much.
I have to choose between charging my phone or my vibrator. This is bullshit.
You're like the Miss Manners of anonymous gay sex.
Refresh my memory....were we forced to leave or did we choose to leave?
Randomize