she looked like the bat from fern gully.
Balls are like the throw pillows of the penis
2010 has been the year of the Eskimo brother. Let's see how many igloos we can shack in next year
then my gynecologist said "its like opening up buried treasure"
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
come over, blizzard of oz party. dress up.
Well, I'm at the grocery store wondering whether I exist or not.
Woah there. I lasted a semester and a fourth of college not having sex. trust me when i say keeping my virginity was an obstacle course of olympic proportions.
The virgin olympics. I would win the gold. For America.
I have got to stop taking so many uppers and downers simultaneously. My life is a Dali painting.
No sorry. I may be a happy drunk but my gag reflux is an angry drunk.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Is it bad that when someone says the phrase "helicopter dick" I immediately think of you?
this party is nice, but i have to go home and cry over anime in order to fill my daily quota of suffering
All I've had to eat today are potatoes...and by that I mean vodka and chips
I have got to stop telling people I was almost a prositute every time I drink
I booty texted him nothing but three exclamation points at 3:05am and he was in my bed 17 minutes later, lest you think punctuation is not important.
For the record, if you sneeze while you have a dildo in your vagina and you dont have a good grip on it, that thing can get some distance.
Randomize