Steel Reserve is the RC Cola of alcohol. It's never ok.
I thought I was at a rave until the paramedics started chasing me. You win again tequila.
how the fuck did you end up in georgia? you were here at my party dry humping some chick 2 hours ago
so you mean to tell me that there is no way you can get me?
Stop being a whore!!! Everyone can see!!!!
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
i knew she was desperate at the point in which she started showing me her naked pics on her phone
oh great, iTunes now thinks im gay.
two words...techno handjob
Hey so summary of last night. I threw up in a rain boot then tipped it over on my bed, did my laundry and passed the fuck out. I feel like I didn't see you.
Yay for living on the edge. I'm trying this new thing where I stop mom-arming people and promote bad decisions. It's working quite well.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Wake up. Pour coffee. Open blinds. Guy is skipping class and jacking off furiously to Asian porn. Close blinds. Finish coffee. So this must be what med school is like.
Dad's teaching me to make moonshine this weekend as "college prep". How scared should I be sis?
He tried to tell me that that stripper was his aunt..
I'm glad he doesn't have a bigger dick because he'd just use it for evil anyway
He took my Spanx off and still fucked me twice. I call that success.
i'm growling thTa how much i wNn slwwwp.
save me some of whatever you're doing i'll be there in five.
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