I just saw Sharon Stone's cootch in high def. I think I'll stay gay.
Just witnessed a fat girl fall off the treadmill, pop a medicine ball, and drink coke out of a water bottle all in one workout.
You stressed the importance of not breaking the seal too early... and then proceeded to piss your pants when you sneezed.
he told me he saved a turtle in the middle of the road.. i told him id be over in ten minutes...i mean he deserves a bj after that.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I don't remember what happened but judging from the contents of my pockets it had something to do with potatoes and glo in the dark condoms
The worst thing about it is now I have to find someone else to fuck in the library.
Like really my mothers day gift is a pic of his dick
If I don't get my shit together, I'm going to be one of those really fucked up cases on 1000 ways to die
3-9 out of 10... Depends on the situation. Taco Bell is more of an idea than a restaurant.
How stoned are you?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I love getting kicked out of places. Its like winning a little league game
DO NOT SLAP ANYONE WITH ANY VEGAN MEAT PATTIES
its 3am and I'm taking a bubble bath, this is what taking a day off work at 30 looks like
What's goes good with Everclear?
Pepto-Bismol and a sandwich.
My mom always wanted to raise a classy lady, it just turned out to not be her daughter.
He went three whole days without making a star wars reference, of course he got sex
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