just wrote on a church. and then stalked a boy, by the way, i fucked him. him being your friend, also, love tacos.
Katy Perry is on a Proactiv commercial. That "I kissed a girl" shit is so much less hot now.
We made out for three hours. Then she said she didn't sleep with redheads and left the party. So yes, I'm still drinking.
I feel like I've wasted too many painkillers on hangovers
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I said "have a good day officer and I'll see you friday when I get arrested for being too drunk.."
Just hook me up with your dad already stop being selfish
I renamed his cat Jeff last night. Well I spray painted it on him.
You don't want any of I have. Seriously. Its 80 proof rum that was 8 bucks for a liter. I'm afraid
I'm sure your liver is writing out a will as we speak
Well my grandma put the turkey in the oven for 4 hours and didn't have the oven on.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Just walked by a girl saying to her friend "honestly you coulda given me any dude and I woulda fucked him"
You should've introduced yourself
There is a Victoria's Secret pageant on right now with Taylor Swift singing in lingerie. I didn't know a penis could get this erect.
I FUCKED THE WRONG FRIEND HELP ME
I can't open my mouth wide enough to make full use of this snapchate update
I'm hosting my annual valentine's day party tomorrow with every hookup I've ever had. thoughts on how it will turn out ??
Heading there now. Already have a boner.
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