My parents came down to check and make sure I wasn't into any mischief then proceeded to give me alcohol.
i kind of just want to tell my cleaning lady I'm an alcoholic so it's not awkward when I stumble out of my room to go sit in my car for 2 hours and wait for her to finish cleaning the several empty bottles of wine in my room
You know why I moved here? No public intoxication law. A cop just helped me from my bent over vomit pose, asked if I was ok, and gave me a ride home.
Ya. I was the definition of a shit show. I woke up outside my door when my alarm went off
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
look in the field by the highway and see if there is a high heel there. Or some Taco Bell bags.
eating on the run again ?
She just mixed her Emergen-C with champagne... Vegas here we come!
1. My arms are cement 2. I wish dogs could answer the phone
I also made him write a nonfiction romance novel about what happened and to give it to me when the time was right
I found us a new booze connection and I'm writing college admissions essays. The future is bright.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Please let me buy the coffee, all my assets are in starbucks gift cards
I have a 8 minute video of a fish tank on my phone.
We need to stop going to pet stores high.
I'm eating taquitos in the bathtub at 5:30 am. What a great end to the night
Great. I broke up with him before he could like my selfie, now I'm down a like.
Enough talk of my burning loins. How is your day?
Rock bottom: having sex rejected while your boyfriend talks in his sleep as you stuff your face with Girl Scout cookies
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