dude just tell them you don't wear clothes. they'll understand
That's when you crack a 10am beer
I think they gave out some kind of ugly girl scholarship I don't know about...
I don't know why I've never thought to take my bong into the bathtub before.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
All she said to me last night is that when her eyes roll back, to release my choke hold.
That's the last time you suggest we can get our tab wiped by out-drinking the bartender.
It was my card, so what do you care that you lost?
Is your card paying for my plan b?
How do I discreetly dispose of sex toy packaging that is recyclable? What to do...what to do?
Between my sister puke and rallying at the bar and my brother sending a drunk passed out naked pic in which his dick was exposed, I don't know which sibling to be more proud of this weekend.
People spilled so much that there was a thin film of beer on the floor. You took a running start, screamed, "SLIP AND SLIDE!" and slid face first through the drywall.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Come get your boy. He's cuddling with a bag of rice on the floor.
Look, the coffee machine died a noble death. It was the way it would have wanted to go. It was a mercy exploding, really.
Also, your girlfriend apologized to me about yesterday. That was nice of the cunt.
The body is still out there. I don't think my trainer realized when he asked me not to drink for 24 days, how often I see dead people
Wanna get drunk and play candy land? If so you are 2 steps behind.
Why do so many fanfic writers want to see hockey players get pregnant?
Randomize