The only problem is i have violated all potential new years resolutions at the new years party.
Please come to History lecture. The kid two seats over is belligerently drunk.
until you tell me otherwise ill assume we're playing "cavity search" the homeland security game to spice up our sex life
Well, that's a 3 inch weight lifted off of my vagina
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
This is working out surprisingly well considering it started out with us using a christmas tree as a battering ram
His roommate just snorted a line of Smirnoff off the desk. I could really fit in here.
The sales associate looked at me funny for wobbling in the heels i was trying on until i told her i was trying to see how well i'd be able to drunk walk in these tonight
Yeah I said my new jacket was waterproof, not puke through your nose proof.
2nd year in a row being a arrested before school starts...tradition at its finest
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'm reffing a fight in Fight Club I don't even know what I'm doing
You called me into the kitchen so you could show me that you were peeing in the kitchen sink and then told me to leave bc you couldn't do it with me watching
I can't believe you won 5 grand from the casio last night and spent more than 80% on tacobell and strippers already
we need to tell them stories about when happens when we're sober so they think they know what they're in for when they're actually completely unprepared for whn happens when we get drunk
I think I'm the first girl to break a bed with a guy, without even having sex with him while doing so.
Only good thing about being an essential worker is that I have a letter allowing me to cross the bridge into jersey to get booze
Randomize