What are these yellow papers in the kitchen?
These are the tickets we got last night.
Did i sign this one as Grizzly Bear?
Yes...yes you did.
it was beautiful and magic like when a hot girl grabs her own tits and smiles at you
why is there a picture of someone wearing Tevas with socks taped on the wall?
We woke up, fucked, and shared a piece of my sister's first communion cake for breakfast.
And you thought you were going to hell last weekend.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I mean, I don't even call it a hangover anymore. It's just morning.
Soo time for a life change, my 6 yr old sister made my gf a puke bucket for her birthday
She didn't talk for 45 minutes. We finally convinced her to open her mouth. There was a flower in there.
Every time I try to stand up the back of my head feels like a bunch of little elves are beating the inside of my scalp with their toy making tools. What disease could this be?
I got carried to one bar. Got a piggy back ride to the next bar. I was just testing our drinking team for st pattys day to make sure they are able to handle me more drunk than that.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Indeed. Apparently I called my sisters and told them I wouldn't get arrested because it's not a real sword.
I just had a spiritual connection with my sweater and did ballet in the hallway. Alone. I'd say we're gonna chalk that up as a win for marijuana and call it a night
He yelled "HOO-ah!" like Al Pacino when he pulled down his pants. Trust me, he has every right to.
yo dude not sure how this happened but im drunk at your house eating burritos with your mom and sister. hope you're having fun in new zealand
Hey, before I head out, whats your policy on casual drug use and one night stands?
Fuck your fuckin pumpkin spice. You and your subtle differences frighten and disgust me.
Randomize