Yeah, she'd be cute...but she has faith. It's a problem down south.
Paddidles count extra in the back of a cop car
Thanks for sticking it out with old horseface last night... I owe you one buddy.
I'll always be here to give you immoral support.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
"can of pringles" is totally a legitimate measure of time
All I could think when I saw it was, "All right, Vagina, only one of us is getting out of this alive."
Tell me again why I left before the topless cake fight
Well she described you as a "Sex-Viking", which seemed to be only slightly related to the red beard. So things are looking good!
i would compare it to sliding down a velcro-covered fireman's pole naked. no more bearded men for me.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
My sober self will be embarrassed tomorrow. For now I am laughing my ass off.
This is what happens when you leave: I get all vulnerable and I make out with the cowboy to shut him up about Jesus.
I think I've been inadvertently participating in a contest to see how many times I can show up to work hungover in my first year of teaching. And I'm the only participant. Not sure if I'm winning or losing.
There is a video of you making out with him, flipping off the camera, and holding the plastic flamigo that you had just stolen out of a yard
I'm trying to find a place to hide weed in my mother in law's house...
Married life problems?
Yes be both agreed it was the worst sex in the history of fornication, so I asked him to sign the condom wrapper so I could frame it as a reminder to NEVER sleep with him again
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