if creeping was an olympic sport, i would be a lock for the gold right now.
No one wears that much makeup to work unless they are trying to fuck their boss, NO ONE
he tried to make a toast, but hit the moving ceiling fan with his beer instead
I'm now at that point where it just feels natural to do a few shots of whisky with breakfast and then head to work
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
She sent me a map and directions for a booty call. In a park. Give me reason not to marry her.
So not the biggest tits he had his cock between. He could have lied.
That guy drinking savagely was actually at his buddy's gay bachelor party in the male stripper section. He came over to the chicks side so we drank with him.
He had some sort of penis-related post traumatic stress disorder, but body shots seemed to wake him up
No, you made a silk sheet toga and held up a dildo calling yourself "The Statue of Puberty". People made pilgrimages from the other party down the block to see you.
The secret to finals week is to have an orgasm for every point you need on the test before you take it.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
What's life without a pregnancy scare?
Puking in the Ritz Carlton bathroom was actually kind of a nice experience
Erin was right. There were bees at the after hours.
wait. i have to tell u something. and it has nothing to do with dildos or spiders
she said she doesn't remember seeing me at all last night. ...I was with her for six hours, there's no way she could have been blackout the whole time
Jenna is yelling bc of the condom wrappers and cum stains. This is the 3rd and last time you have sex in my roommates bed.
Randomize