There's something fitting about a hot in-car interracial makeout to the tune of 'healing the world.' RIP Mike.
is it sad that i can masturbate and get my big O just from thinking about a Tiffany engagement ring?
I just spent an unhealthy amount of money overnighting a full adult sized Trix Rabbit Halloween costume
In The Air Tonight was playing in the dentist's office. Had to stop the cleaner to do the drums.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
He cummed in my mouth, then said he had to go because his best friend broke his foot falling off of a balcony, put twenty dollars in my hand and was gone before I could even swallow...
I'm in the bar bathroom about to pass out. But it's ok cause I set my alarm to go off for last call.
I accidentally peed all over the couch. It's safe to say I'm not welcome at that house anymore
Very impressive. My GPA is the same amount of orgasms I can offer tonight (valid only tonight): 3.5
I also love beards. The playoffs are like christmas for my vagina.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
So, I'm drinking, and I put my head down in the table. The cat jumped up to check on me, I have a cat sober monitor.
If it makes you feel any better about life I'm wearing yoga pants with granny panties and toms with socks cause fuck my life
I woke up with a cutting board and a bag of uncooked pasta next to me.
My vagina is officially offended.
I just paid a hobo to give me his Santa hat so I can take Christmas nudes. Will send them later, they're fire.
Did you get your nipples pierced? I felt something poking through my shirt earlier and I really didn't want to say anything in front of your grandma...
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