thought so. i woke up and he was playing with my eyeliner. I MAKE GREAT CHOICES.
suntimes in life you find a rare opportunity, mine was bonin my gf in front of the tv
i think i just witnessed the elusive male walk of shame
You tried to call the hospital and left a voicemail asking if you could be put on the liver transplant list as a "pre-caution"
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I woke up on the steps beside a plate of spaghetti and a toilet paper roll ripped in half. And i actually think this day is gonna get better.
i'm drinking with a bunch of phds, i feel very stupid but good about my drinking abilities
you just used a box of cheese-its to get into the bar
Looking for the remote in the couch. Finding Adderall beads. Considering utilizing.
There is a girl on the metro with no shoes and she's using a Crown Royal bag as a purse.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
all i remember is him tryin to explain to the girls how to effectively hit the strip club with their bfs
hes actually pretty persuasive when he drinks
Just saw a midget on an elliptical. Epic.
I remember because you made a pirate noise when you came.
Is drinking before noon still a bad idea if you invent an amazing cocktail?
She's passed out with a slice of pizza between her boobs should I just eat it and leave
OF COURSE I NEED TO KNOW I MUST KNOW EVERYTHING
YOU ARE NOT OMNIPOTENT AND YOU HAVE TO DEAL WITH THAT
I AM OMNIPOTENT AND YOU HAVE TO DEAL WITH THAT
Randomize