I miss you like a fat girl misses the prom.
Wow i just got reported to security for being a homeless person trying to break into the library.
she's got a whisker from her dead cat taped to the wall. I'm pretty sure that about sums it up...
and then they started calling me 'Shitshow Shandra', which apparently i took as a compliment.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I just watched nsync videos for the past half hour and you could totally tell lance bass was gay in all of them
He wants a "vagina fling" before he commits to dick for life. I'm gonna allow it.
Bro, there is a rent-a-cop selling syringes out of the trunk of his car. This is why I hate the DMV.
Please put me in a whole with no windows and never let me out.
Pretty sure I scared him off for good. The lesbian in me is ecstatic.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
so i ran into nick. i may be more gay than anticipated
When a best friend shows up on a tricycle with a case a beer and goes "get on loser" you get on, because there is a magical adventure afoot
We need to make tonight low-budget
Is this your way of suggesting flasks?
It's times when I'm naked but also want to be platonically social that I miss you the most.
leads to pukin, then cryin, then 24hr masturbatin binge, then cryin again and finally a combination of all 3
My roommate's overnight guest is screaming about the dog licking his asshole. I need a new place to live.
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